well.

I think from my posts lately, there's been a lack of meaning in them. Just telling about events that take place but not showing what happens - there of, because of, and what is expected of - doesn't make for a very interesting story. Not that flowering a story up with choice words and polished adjectives are needed to make something interesting or 'more real,' but when even raw feeling and thought processes are missing, it just seems pointless.

And now I've placed pressure on myself to write something very meaningful, insightful, and terribly interesting to all who read. Well. That probably won't happen, although, I don't have the slightest idea as of what I'm going to write about now. That's what journaling is to me though. Just recording thoughts as I have them. Maybe some of them I've had before and so they're a little more sharpened than others, but they're still coming to me at the moment.

It's a very good thing to feel better. I'm not so incredibly crazy as I felt last week, although I'm still on antibiotics. I think just getting back into the routine of life - going to bed ontime, going to work, church, normal things - put my head back on straight.

This morning, I decided to read the book of Daniel. I don't think I've ever read the whole book in one sitting. I didn't have any deep or new insight on the text, but I decided to break out the big books and read about the Exile of the Jews in Babylon. It was especially interesting because I had just read Ezra, Nehemiah, and parts of Zechariah and Habbakkuk not long ago. It was neat to fill in the gaps and see how things happened and what happened first. History has always been a favorite subject of mine, and I'm making it more of a subject of study this year. I plan on going through the main wars and reading a few books on each and spending much more time learning about the history we learn from the bible - there is so much I don't understand! But that really motivates me to learn more! I wonder if I'll be able to make it a whole year just studying on my own though. Maybe I'll have to go off to school in winter after all.

I have to leave for work soon. I went back to work yesterday at the ballet boutique. I don't especially enjoy this job. It's retail. It's boring. It's easy. And my boss is difficult to please. I decided I'm going to start looking for another job now though, as irritiaing as it is to change from job to job to job within such a short timeframe. But, it just seems right.

I need to go change the laundry out and take a shower.

I'm sure I'll have more to say later. I have to go to the doctors a FOURTH time too. I'm not too happy about that. More Co-Pays.

-becca