I'm so excited! I made up a joke a few months ago:

What do you call a bass vocalist who sings by himself?

So-low.

Then, some short time later, I was making my rounds through rinkworks' funny jokes (www.rinkworks.com) and thought of my joke, so I submitted it.

And, they put it up!

http://rinkworks.com/jokes/

hahaha.

School starts tomorrow. I am excited about diving into it. Though, stupidly, we have school for only two days, then the weekend, except it's a 3-day weekend because Monday's a holiday. Dumb! Oh well, it was like this last year, so I shouldn't be all surprised. But, it's like, I won't even have any homework to do over the break because I won't have had most of my weekly classes yet!

On kids: Lately, I'm thinking, maybe no on kids for a while. I know, I know, I always said "man, I just want to get married and have a dozen kids right off the bat" and "if I don't get married, I'm just going to adopt a bunch of kids" and "if I don't adopt a bunch of kids, I'm going to move to a foreign country and run an orphanage". But, you know, kids are expensive, and if becca's going to have a lot of them, maybe I should just help her out with them.

Also, I kind of want to be free to start up the tea shop before waiting for all my kids to move out. That way, it could be up and running by the time becca's kids move out, and she could just sort of slide in.

But marriage would be the big question here. I know that if I get married, I want to have kids. At this moment, my feelings sway in the opposite direction of marriage. I'm kind of envisioning myself as the neighborhood spinster aunt, again.

But, I can't just start up a tea shop on no money; I have to have a job. It'll be difficult to have a job and start up a tea shop at the same time, though. The obvious solution? Get married. Husband will work while I do the tea shop.

But then there are the kids that will inevitably come. I can't run a tea shop with kids!

But then, do I wait for them to grow up and move out? Will I be too old by then? Sigh.

Life is full of dilemmas like this. I'm only 18, maybe I shouldn't be planning my future based on my whims of the moment.

Maybe I should forego the tea shop and assume that heaven will allow for a joy like that. I do think we will have the same personalities and desires in heaven. I've been thinking a lot about that lately.

See, there are a few things that I feel are "just wrong". Cameroon, for instance. It's such a bittersweet thing. I miss it so much, because the memories of it are so beautiful. I don't want to go back and spoil them by looking at it through adult eyes. I thrive on memories. I showed Jessica a piece of handwriting I had done when I was 9 or something. I know why I saved it; it was a momento of something that will never happen again. Me being 9. My little sister turned 9 today.

But in heaven, I don't think our wonderful memories will be erased. The Bible does not say, "Everything will be new." It says, "Everything will be made new". I don't know, I like the idea of a perfected Earth better than a brand new, foreign place. And I think heaven will be like that. I'll be like a child, and I'll be able to visit Cameroon and remember my childhood perfectly, and it will be so, so wonderful.

If this is confusing, know that I don't have it all straight in my mind yet. My main point: In heaven, God will respect, and give me the means to fulfill, the unfulfilled godly (and God-given) desires I had on earth.